In San Marcos, Texas, there used to be a tourist attraction called Aquarena Springs that featured a swimming pig, named Ralph. I've never seen Ralph swim, but I did sit in my car in the parking lot of Aquarena Springs for about 10 minutes once, contemplating whether it was worth the $15 to see that pig swim. I decided against because, as I figured it, a swimming pig was not all that amazing. If I'm not mistaken, every animal, insect, foul, reptile, etc, except for human beings, has the natural ability to swim to some degree. So, a swimming pig would not be all that remarkable. Rather, what would be remarkable would be the type of person who would pay $15 dollars for a 10 minute show featuring women with large thighs in unattractive swimsuits frolicking with a swine that no doubt, had relieved itself in the pool water on numerous prior occasions. But I didn't need to pay money to see those people. I watched them. Then I left and got some lime sherbert. Kind of a crappy day now that I think about it.
UPDATE: I did some hands on research. I stand corrected. Not all God's creatures have the natural ability to swim. Anyone know where I can find a hermit crab on a Sunday afternoon? The kids will be home in a couple of hours.
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